Perfectionism vs. Confidence
Why Does One Steal Your Power and the Other Sets You Free?
This is about perfectionism vs. confidence, and how it showed up in my life.
You know that person who walks into someone else’s house and quietly flips the toilet paper roll the “right” way?
That used to be me.
(Okay, maybe not always out loud… but inside? Oh, it mattered.)
Perfectionism, on one hand, whispers that things must be a certain way—spotless, flawless, symmetrical—or something is wrong. And if something is wrong, I must be wrong.
But here’s what I’ve learned: real confidence, by comparision, doesn’t need everything to be perfect. It doesn’t even want that. It wants truth. In reality: movement and flexibility. Even mess.
Because a confident person, like Super Maximo, doesn’t believe in perfect. He believes in possible. In progress. In prevailing.
When it comes to perfectionism vs. confidence, the difference is clear: one keeps you stuck in fear, while the other moves you forward in trust.
The Hidden Fear Underneath “Perfect”
Most of us aren’t born perfectionists. We become them.
I was told from a young age that I wasn’t good enough. Not smart enough. Not worthy of a place at the table. Those words sink in, and before long, they build walls.
My wall was perfectionism.
If I could make everything just right, maybe no one would see the pain inside. Maybe I could finally earn the approval that always felt out of reach.
But perfectionism isn’t confidence. It’s fear in fancy clothes.
It’s a mask that says, “If I do everything right, maybe I won’t be judged.”
Confidence Lives in the Mess
A truly confident person can have dishes in the sink, hair out of place, and still feel like they’re enough.
They know they can meet challenges head-on—even the ugly ones.
They’re not trying to earn a seat at the table. They bring their own.
Letting Go of Perfect
Letting go of perfectionism isn’t about lowering your standards. It’s about changing the story.
Instead of asking:
- What will people think of me?
Try:
- What do I think of me?
Instead of aiming for flawlessness, try aiming for honour: living in alignment with your values, your truth, and your real capacity to grow.
Because confidence doesn’t come from looking good. It comes from being real.
And real is messy. But powerful.
Are you ready to drop the mask?
If this message spoke to you, follow this blog for more bold truths, grounded insights, and a little laughter from the journey.